The lolitas war will not take place!
This post will be confusing and, above all, will lead to a discussion. But now, I’m not afraid anymore about this; too often in the past, I was told what I should do or not… Today, I want to talk about my breakup with the Lolita fashion. I said, few time ago, I would never make a scandal about this world if I had to leave it. I didn’t make one and I have not been part of it anymore (strictly speaking), for a long time. So don’t expect any gossip, any personal critics nor any names of Lolitas here… only my feelings, my experiences – the good ones and the bad ones – as a former Lolita who has wandered this world a lot since 2004 and who has provided it many contributions. This post is important, as Lolita fashion was, is and will be, despite everything, a part of my life.
When I approached this fashion for the first time, I was just a dumb teenager looking for herself, feeling ill at ease, and revolting against all the straitjackets of life: family, job, society. Lolita fashion saved me, if I may say so. It allowed me to be part of a community which I had my place within, where I was known as a personality/character without being “rejected” or “ostracized”. It was not just some 100 euros frilly dresses for me: it was far more than that: it was freedom allowing me to express and emancipate myself, bringing to light who I was truly deep down within myself. Not a sheep represented by only one brand or one style (even if I have and had my favorite brands).
Lolita was emancipating. A artistic visual expression at the cost of the words I couldn’t express,to the detriment of a social integration I couldn’t obtain, despite all my efforts.
And one day, I don’t know how exactly, Lolita, which was freeing, started impeding me. Impeding my freedom of thought, my freedom of speech (At risk of being victim of violent critics, dramas, or worst, Lolita secrets, or trying to sully the association’s reputation-which I created!!! (how ironic) and even worse: to inhibit my creativity). Indeed, I realized one bright morning, that Lolitas prevented me from being really myself… and this had been for many years. I deeply regret this. But I cannot do anything against that. Things change, mentalities evolve. Not me. I still have the same ideas as before, the same ideals although I have matured. My desire for freedom is even stronger than before. Especially my freedom of speech and the freedom to be well dressed in order to be happy. Because what is important, is being happy,being in harmony with oneself, and having self-respect. So, if Lolita prevents me from being happy, I will not be Lolita anymore. P.S.: I’m so very sorry to disappoint you: if you expected some juicy gossips, about associations, about rivalries between Miss So and so, or cat fights/hair pulling… I’ve warned you since the very beginning: it has never been my intention.